I've Been Tagged!

My sweet friend Nellie Todd over at Nellie's Cozy Place tagged me today to answer the following questions!  Well...why not?  Those of you who have read my book already now so much about me, but these question prompts are more about personal likes.  How about you?  What would your answers be?

1) Are you named for someone?
     Yes. I was named after my precious Aunt Cherie.  Cherie is my middle name and it means my dear in    French.

2) When was the last time you cried?
     Last Tuesday morning. I had just finished a book by Kristin Hannah, and the drama she wrote really        tugged at my heart.

3) Do you have Kiddos?
    Yes, I am blessed to have a daughter and a son, both grown and living in Kentucky, a loooong drive from     my home.

4) If you were another person, would you be a friend to yourself?
    I have to admit, I've never thought about such a question!  But, I would say "yes," because I love having       friends and being a friend, so I think I would be-friend myself. LOL

5) Do you have a guilty pleasure?
    I really love ice cream, but don't buy it or eat it because of the sugar count.

6) Do you like handwriting?
    I always wished my handwriting was prettier, like my mom's and mother-in-law's.  I treasure handwritten   notes, but do most of my writing on the computer.

7) What is your favorite cereal?
    Oatmeal (hot) or Cranberry Almond Crunch by Post

8) What is the first thing you notice about people?
    Whether or not they are smiling.

9) What is the color of your eyes?
    Blue/Grey.  I lady I worked for in a law office one summer (when I was in college) told me that my eyes are the color of the ocean.  I've always remembered her saying that.  It was such a sweet comment.

10) Scary movie or Happy ending?
    Definitely a Happy Ending!!!  I don't enjoy suspense at all.

11) Favorite TV Shows?
     Well, my husband is a Fox News junkie; but besides that, we enjoy Blue Bloods with Tom                     Selleck, and Restaurant Impossible with Robert Irvine.

12) Do you like winter or summer?
     Living in the hot and humid South, I suppose I prefer winter, when we get a break!

13) Hugs or Kisses?
     Can a girl pick BOTH?

14) Do you have a special talent?
     I suppose I have a talent for encouraging others, and for stringing words together.

15) Where were you born?
     I was born in New York City.  Hardly lived there though.

16) What are your hobbies?
     Reading, Writing, Drawing, Painting and scrapbooking.

17) Do you have any pets?
     I would dearly love a dog or cat or bunny rabbit. Alas, I have allergies and can not have pets.

18) What's your favorite movie(s)?
     Miss Potter / August Rush / Young Victoria

19) What color is your car?
     Awww, over ten years ago I got a PT Cruiser which I had custom painted after my son damaged the side      panel.  It is two-toned and I consider it my "mid life crisis wheels!"

20) What do you want to be when you grow up?
     A popular author and speaker, making a difference in the lives of others by sharing God's Truth.
  Maybe someday that dream will come true!


Now, precious ones, I'd love to hear your answers!

And I'm TAGGING a few sweet friends...

Jacquelyn Stager at Life Between the Buns
Elaine Olsen at Peace for the Journey
Linda at Spiritual Memoirs 101

Our FLAG...

Stands for FREEDOM!

I'm emotional this year, as we celebrate the 4th of July.
Perhaps because the America I love is changing so rapidly; perhaps because I sense a growing disdain for our country, our flag, our freedoms.

Maybe I'm feeling this way because I have lived in other countries and saluted other flags while studying in foreign lands. I truly believe that AMERICA is Exceptional!  The Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave.  I've heard it said that no other country gives the amount of money in foreign aid that we do!  Our humanitarian efforts are unsurpassed. Yes, we are opinionated, but we are generous and quick to help those in need. I pray that we won't give in to a lethargic, critical, socialistic attitude; but that we will esteem our roots: the blessing of GOD and the bravery of those who purchased our national freedom. May we continue to be defenders of life, liberty and happiness.

AMERICA the Beautiful!
AMERICA the Caring!
AMERICA the Free!

Join me in praying for this awesome country, that our leaders will have wisdom from on high, and that they will acknowledge the blessing of Almighty GOD.  May we humble ourselves and turn from our sinful ways (the greed and selfishness that tries to overtake us), and seek the face of our CREATOR.

GOD SAVE AMERICA!
2 Chronicles 7:14

LOVE Without Conditions

Growing up, love was elusive.  The more I wanted to feel connected, the more distance I sensed.  I suppose that’s common in households with substance abuse. When parents struggle to squelch their own emotional pain, there’s not much energy left to tend to their children’s hearts and souls.

In my house, Mother was a classy, complicated alcoholic.  Our relationship was always strained.  Still, as her firstborn and only daughter, I yearned for closeness.  Then, after years of shouldering her pain and meeting her needs, I finally broke free.  Unfortunately, the scene that followed my betrayal of independence was the stuff of nightmares.

Mom was starting a new life in Colorado, ending a failed 20 year marriage to my dad.  She needed my help with the drive from New Jersey, and the unpacking.  The journey would take nearly three weeks (the summer before my senior year of college), so I left my part-time jobs and my boyfriend, to be of service.  Everything about that trip was a challenge! To top it off, the movers were delayed by over a week.

Unable to settle her “nest,” tensions ran high in my mother who tried desperately to control the issues and people in her life.  Her fury reached a crescendo one August afternoon when I took the initiative to call the airlines, reserving a return flight to Jersey.  Mom’s thinking probably went like this: How dare my daughter take matters into her own hands!  How unfair of her to choose to leave before the movers arrive… before all the work of unpacking!

Oblivious to anyone else’s needs, Mom’s anger reached a new zenith as soon as I hung up the phone. Immediately she unleashed a tirade of abuse that scorched my soul.  Mom physically backed me into the guest room, where I cowered in the corner, hands over my face.  Though I began to sob uncontrollably, she continued to spew her rage.  As she exited the room, slamming the door, she screamed, “You are the scum of the earth!”

I was stunned and broken hearted.  Once again, my efforts to help my mother had fallen short.  It wasn’t my fault that the movers were delayed and we were in limbo, roaming an empty house.   But I had taken a stand, making a decision that was best for me, and she was livid. The wounds her tongue inflicted that day left lifelong bruises.  All I wanted was to feel loved, and instead I was labeled a disappointment.

Ever since childhood, I thought love was something you earned.  Maybe if I worked hard enough in school and brought home stellar grades, I’d feel loved.  Maybe if I kept my mouth shut, and only spoke kind words, I’d feel loved.  Maybe if I agreed with everyone’s opinion, I’d feel loved. Maybe if I lost the extra weight, I’d feel loved.  It seemed to me only those who were beautiful and compliant were loved.

            However, when the standard is perfection everyone fails.  When love is conditional, no one feels secure.   It took years for me to understand I wasn’t alone in my struggle to feel loved. I finally realized that imperfect parents, who felt unloved as children, often pass the same feelings to their offspring.  But there is One who loves us beyond measure; the One who gave His life so we could experience true love, and live whole. 

            A couple of years after I first met Jesus, He confronted the neediness in my heart.  It had been over 6 years since that awful episode with my mother, and I was now eight months pregnant with my first child.  Taking an afternoon break with a book in hand, I lounged on the sofa with my legs propped up. The afternoon sun filtered through the curtains, spreading a delightful warmth over my body as my baby kicked softly inside my womb. Absorbed in the words I was reading, I relaxed and relished the stillness of the house.

            Suddenly I hear a voice say, “Let me love you.  Let me love you.”

            At once I recognized the speaker.  How like God to interrupt my thoughts, affirming my heart with gentle assurance.  He loves me despite my imperfections and shortcomings.  Ever the gentleman, He asked me to accept His unconditional love.  What a blessing!  And just in time.  Within weeks I would begin my own motherhood journey.  I needed to be secure in Jesus’ unconditional love, so I could pass it on to my daughter…even if imperfectly.

HEART HEALING SUMMER READING...

GIVE-AWAY!

This summer, when schedules relax a little, take time to tend to your heart!
Just as we need to keep after the weeds in our gardens, we also need to weed our hearts for "roots" of unforgiveness and resentment.

Because my memoir, THE MOTHER GAP, addresses how forgiveness brings connection and peace, I'm offering it along with another timely book as a summer Give-Away.  If you've already read these, they still make wonderful gifts!

Here's how you enter to win:  Leave a comment here about a lesson you learned from your mom that has made a difference in your life.  I will take the names of those who comment, and add them to the comments on our FB page The Mother Gap... drawing a name on JUNE 29th!

Summer Blessings~

The FORGIVENESS Factor

What if there was a new reality show where all the contestants demonstrated Forgiveness?  Let's say the format revolved around recounting instances when folks forgave others and experienced the release of joy and freedom which comes with the true act of overlooking another's faults.  How uplifting would that be?

Forgiveness is something we desperately need.
After all, "to err is human," and we certainly mess up from time to time!
The dilemma is in extending forgiveness when we've been wronged.
It's so challenging when we're hurt, to let go of the grievance, whether small or large.
Hanging on to insults, affronts or thoughtless actions is so much easier.

But then GOD shows us a better way to live in the life and work of His Son, JESUS.
For Love, Jesus endured the torture of the cross and paid for our sins.
His example encourages us let go of bitterness and resentment.
His HOLY SPIRIT enables us to overlook and forgive.

My book "The Mother Gap" is a memoir of learning to love and accept one of the most important people in our lives...our mothers.

It's available on Amazon, so check it out!

~ Live Loved, and Forgive ~

Honoring MOTHERS!

In honor of all the hard working, caring and loving MOMs, here is a Tea Time Give-Away!

Three ways to enter:

1) Share something about your mother on this blog post within the next 8 days and your name will be entered in the drawing for the Tea Time Basket.

2 & 3) Leave a comment on Amazon for my book THE MOTHER GAP (only if you've read it of course), and/or check out the video trailer on YouTube to leave a comment there.

SO THERE ARE THREE PLACES YOU CAN LEAVE YOUR NAME!

We will pick the WINNER randomly at 7pm EST on Mother's Day, Sunday, May 11th and notify the them by email to get a shipping address.  All the folks who have already posted comments are included!!!

God bless you this Mother's Day and always~

Almost May and Mother's Day!

Hi All,

As we say "Goodbye" to the month of April this week, I pray that your spring is off to a joyous start!

With May approaching, I'm delighted to see THE MOTHER GAP touching so many hearts.
Do you know someone who feels alienated from her mom?  Or perhaps, a young mother who might benefit from my memoir and treasure her children more.  Copies of my book can be purchased at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or directly from me.  It makes a great gift!

Oh, and I want to share a brand new video trailer for the book.  What do you think?
Please leave me a comment with your thoughts.



Blessings!
Jessica